NLP and Provocative Therapy in San Francisco Sept 2008

I'm getting ready to travel and then to present at the IASH Conference in the USA. Here is the information for the two presentations

IASH Conference Sept 2008 San Francisco
Provocative Therapy and NLP by Nick Kemp
Length of Presentation: 90 minDate of Presentation: 7th Sept 2008Presentation Times: 9:15-10:45

This presentation consists of demonstrations and discussion relating to Provocative Therapy as created by Frank Farrelly. During the presentation the delegates will experience how to use the PT toolkit when dealing with clients. This will include explanations and examples of using the "blame list" in a PT context and how to produce change in client behaviour in a provocative conversational context.
The session will also explore the "What's wrong with that?" and "Insane solutions" strategies for dealing with client problems in the context of "Provocative Therapy modules" or interviews. I will also be explaining PT from an NLP perspective in respect of pattern interrupts, generating rapport, using metaphors, timeline work and other elements.
I will give examples of how I have used PT when working with a range of client conditions and commenting on what has proved most successful to date. I have had the opportunity to work with Frank Farrelly and Richard Bandler and have interviewed both of them for my http://www.nlpmp3.com site and will also discuss each's take on PT and NLP.

Provocative Change Works™ by Nick Kemp
Length of Presentation: 90 minDate of Presentation: 5th Sept 2008Presentation Times: 11:00-12:30

This presentation consists of demonstrations and discussion of the "Provocative Change Works" approach that I teach in seminars and use in private practice. This approach was inspired by my NLP studies with Richard Bandler, study of hypnosis and my studies with Frank Farrelly, creator of Provocative Therapy.

I will include a series of exercises including the "Internal Voice Tempo Exercise" that was published in Steve Andreas's newsletter and which I have used to great effect with clients who have anxiety issues and phobias.
Many of the Provocative Change Works approaches were shown on my recent "Provocative Change Works for Phobias" DVD set which also had narration by Frank Farrelly himself. As suggested in this context I was primarily working with longstanding phobics, but the same approach works well with many other conditions and especially anger, OCD and jealousy issues. In 2006 I was asked to appear on BBC Radio in the UK to work with different phobics on a weekly basis to then appear live on the air with the clients to feedback the results. In this environment time constraints meant that I had to work very quickly and during this 26 week period I developed many of the exercises and approaches that proved most successful in this arena.
The presentation will be mostly interactive and I intend to explore at least two of the Farrelly exercises which give an excellent insight into the Provocative aspect of my work which when specifically used in conjunction with NLP and hypnosis have consistently produced excellent results with my clients.

http://www.nickkemp.com/

Quotes from Richard Bandler co creator of NLP

I collected a bunch of quotes over the years from Richard Bandler, co creator of NLP. The full list appears here

http://www.nickkemp.com/Nick_Kemp_definition-what-is-Neuro-linguistic-programming_NLP.php

Here are 3 favourites

All we are ever doing is putting things together or taking things apart"

"We take the very best of what people do, synthesise it down, make it learnable and share it with each other - and that is what the real future of what NLP will be and its gonna stay that way!"

"If your world isn't moving a hundred times faster than your client, then you're not going to see the other person's patterns. You won't have the time to observe them or replay their behaviour to detect their patterns."

Stalkers of NLP Trainers and jealousy issues

Over the years I have seen many people with jealousy and stalking issues. Both myself and other trainers have also experienced "cyber stalkers" who obsessively e-mail and post on online newsgroups for hours on end, usually in an extremely verbose and not especially entertaining manner.
What's interesting is that the behavioural patterns are similar in both instances where the person filters their view of the world through just one lens and remains wholly fixated on what they imagine is occuring, regardless of any facts or independant verifiable information. In many instances the person's internal dialogue is out of control and resulting in them feeling increasingly anxious.

Don't confuse me with the facts!
A mistake some therapists and practitioners when dealing with jealous clients and stalkers is to go down the route of trying to convince jealous folks and stalkers with counter examples to what they imagine is occuring!

This usually doesn't work and only reinforces the previous pattern. Stalkers often have jealousy issues and very little going on in their own lives which then results in them wholly fixating on other people's behaviours and "injustices" that they imagine have occurred!

As someone once said "Dont confuse me with the facts, my mind is made up!"

In the era of the internet and e-mail communication is far more instant and although there are definate advantages to this there is also a downside where individuals can literally spend hours on social chat sites like Facebook or other NLP equivilents. This can become mentally problematic when people start running their whole lives around these mediums. I actually heard of an IT consultant who didn't leave his bedroom for 6 months in Australia. He had severe jealousy and obsession issues and found it difficult to trust other people

The Cult of personality and NLP anti trainers
I noticed today that a major newspaper ran an article on Paul McKenna which was full of accusations and clearly designed to attract readers in a sensationalistic fashion. NLP trainers and celebrities are often easy targets from usually anonymous posters who can rant on blogs and on online forums.

Some of these online comments are hysterically funny and recent examples include

"You suck.
You're a creep!"

I am compiling many of these examples for a future article as well as for some workshop material. The best insults will make it onto one of my sites nd I have offered $ for examples! I have asked one new fanatic to submit at least 200 words by August 10th and fingers crossed he will be up to the task, we'll see! For more on jealousy check out

http://www.nickkemp.com/

NLP and Hypnosis products - recording and listening

Recording audio and video is a real test of "state control" especially if its for projects that will later be released into the public domain. When I first released "The Adventures of Well Being Now" back in 2001, I spent literally hours making sure that the sound and the performance were as good as they could be. Of course now when I listen back (which I rarely do one something is recorded) I can always hear what could have been improved as technology and my own skills have both improved!

State Control in recording
I learned huge amounts from writing and recording products (these can be purchased online at http://www.human-alchemy.com/) especially in learning about the structure and delivery of language. The best performance states require a combination of relaxation and concentration and taking care to ensure that the internal dialogue is appropriately sorted!

Great, good and not so good NLP Products...
Back in 2001 I scooped up a many NLP nd Hypnosis products that I could find and was astounded by how many of them were not well recorded. In 2006 I ran a workshop on creating an audio product wich included writing and recording. This was a fascinating insight into this creative process and one of my favourite events. Over the 5 days students began to see extraordinary improvements in their delivery and were also suitably surprised at how technology provides many options in mastering.

During the event I played the students a number of well known CDs which had been released by NLP trainers and we analysed to explore the production and content on each one. Many were amazed that some of the editing was really dreadful and in one instance a CD on the power of language did not display the best tonality from the author...

Video products also vary massively in quality and delivery. In many instances the cameras were not mounted correctly and the whole video lurches from side to side. Another mistake is to take an audio feed from the camera rather than from a mixing desk, which makes for a dreadful listening experience. Poor attention to lighting also ca be a problem and can't help but wonder that if NLP is about modelling then a lot of these basic elements have not been considered!

Fortunately there are some excellent products in the marketplace and here are those that I recommend

Doug O Brien "How Deep The Rabbit Hole?"
Dave Dobson Funshop 2006 CD set
Richard Bandler Magical Structures CDs
Frank Farrelly A Provocative Approach DVD set
Bandler/LaValle Hypnosis in Munich
Provocative Change Works DVD set by Nick Kemp (myself) with Frank Farrelly

NLP variety and the art of learning

In the last decade I have been fortunate enough to have trained with a wide range of trainers, including Richard Bandler, Frank Farrelly, Michael Breen, Doug O Brien, Andrew T Austin, John LaValle among many others.

Trainers who Inspire

Each have inspired a host of different insights and allowed me to develop a range of different skills. As well as attending "formal trainings" some of the best insights have come from conversations outside such events. In particular my regular conversations with Frank Farrelly, Steve Andreas and Andy Austin have really helped me develop skills in private practice. Each of these guys has a very different approach, but they all have solid experience in working with real clients "in the trenches"

NLP and other products that inspire

Many such folks have created excellent products in either written format, DVDs or CDs. Some of the best include Dave Dobson's Fun Shop Series, Andy Austin's The Rainbow Machin book, Frank Farrelly's original Provocative Therapy and subsequent audio and video material, Richard Bandler's Magical Structures CDs among others. When I first started out learning NLP I listened to hours of material and did exactly the same when I began to study Frank Farrelly's work. In an era of the internet and e-mail there is no better time for learning!

In my opinion one of the secrets to learning is to learn from a variety of different sources to then build and integrate your own skills. I also am a longstanding student of learning the guitar and here the same principals apply. I have learned from Blues, Folk and Rock Specialist players and all of these styles have kept me fluid in my playing and not fixed in one specific style, but rather taking elements from all these styles

By training with the very best players and having access to the very best material, learning becomes easier and far more fun!

Real NLP, working "in the trenches"

Since the 1990s I have met some great NLPers. All of these have constantly used their training skills in a variety of different ways and developed their own style of working, rather than merely parroting phrases they heard in a training. In music there are also players who merely copy other players and who never develop any creativity in their own right. I have often made some quite controversial comments about the parroting and I make no apologies for doing so! No approach is the holy grail and universal solution to all problems, but the creators of NLP knew to learn from the best and that philosophy is a great strategy for skill development.

Not everyone has natural creative skills, but in my experience those who seek out a wide range of influences usually produce some excellent outcomes and even surprise themselves in the process!

http://www.nickkemp.com/

Anxiety, NLP and the Credit Crunch

Historically around one in five of the clients I see in private practice would be for anxiety related issues. In the last 12 months this has increased to one in two!

The Credit Crunch and Anxiety

I suspect that a raft of issues have contributed to this trend including fuel price increases, banking problems, increased food prices, house price increases and other elements that have all been generalised under the term "the credit crunch" As I write this I can see a caption on Sky TV that proclaims "Consumer confidence falls to its lowest level since 1974"

All of these occurances inevitably affect the financial status of people and cause a big upswing in anxiety levels

I am mindful of a famous line out of Blackadder where Edmund says the following to Baldrick

"I feel like a penguin, everywhere I look there is a bill in front of me"

Talking Therapy and the "How questions"

I work alongside many psychotherapists and other talking therapy individuals and all colleagues report a big increase in client enquiries, most of these being for stress related conditions.

One of the greatest mistakes in treating anxiety is to take the analytical approach, where the therapist relentlessley seeks to dig into the client's past in order to try and find the "root of the problem" My experience from having worked with literally hundreds of clients is that "the why questions" are not as crucial as "the how questions" The key question in working with clients is to consider "How do they do that?" Once the strategy has been elicited, then its far easier to to change the stuck state to one where the client experiences greater freedom.

Provocative Change Works

Many colleagues are surprised that often client conditions are resolved within 3 sessions, whereas with many approaches a client can see a therapist for months on end. I have found the Provocative Change Works approach (see http://www.provocativechangeworks.com/) to really accelerate great results, especially with anxiety related conditions. I was delighted to receive an e-mail from a colleague saying how he had great results using many of the Provocative Change Works techniques with a number of clients with anxiety related issues.

The value of peer group interactions

One of the reasons why I have so much success with clients and in developing new approaches to problems is that I have great contact with some of the best minds in change work. These include Frank Farrelly, Steve Andreas and Andrew T Austin. All these individuals are passionate about helping people and demonstrate a skill level that is uncommon in this day and age!

http://www.nickkemp.com/

Crazies, nutters and stalkers...

I have written extensively about some of the craziness that occurs online, especially in the world of NLP, which can be crazily territorial. Some folks spend literally hours online attacking different trainers. It seems the more pupular the trainer, the more attention that's created. Of course Richard Bandler is the main target and I saw recently in a particular an especially unpleasant individual was once again attempting to drone on and on about his imagined past history!

I too have had a share of crazies and online stalkers over the years and even had one incensed individual posting 200+ posts each month about how outraged they were by various posts I had made online criticising some of the stupidity that passes for advice. The idea that NLP or any other changework approach is a fix all for all of life's problems is of course quite ridiculous. A few years ago I was chatting to a colleague who asked "Have you had your first stalker yet? I was somewhat surprised by the question, but now realise that there are many sad and lonely individuals that are hell bent on fixating onto people in the public domain to the point of obsession.

Many celebrities encounter this kind of problem and some even hire protection for some of the crazier individuals. A number of years ago I even had someone issue death threats stating "I'm coming rund to kills you!" I politely requested - "Please make it between 3pm and 4pm as I'll be in meetings before and after these times...
Needless to say he failed to appear at the requested time!