Friday 10 October 2008

Two very different pieces of feedback from the Farrelly evening


The Frank Farrelly evening was IMO quite fascinating, especially as Frank worked with a delegate who is terminally ill, with only a few months to live. Here are two pieces of feedback which are very different and I'll let you decide which person was able to notice more about how Frank's approach works in a very multi layered manner. I recorded the session and as ever I am amazed by how people filter experiences in different ways.


PERSPECTIVE 1 FROM A GP

I thought I would post just to say what a delight Frank's evening was on the 3rd of October. A lady having late phase treatment for breast cancer,with concerns around sexuality,sexual functioning,and the very content of her remaining life had a session with Frank, and it was an absoloutely excellent teaching event.It was immensely generous of the client to be prepared to have this witnessed by everyone there and I salute her,and send her my heartfelt thanks.
As a doctor myself, I have so often come across people with life threatening illness being effectively ostracised,and shut down when they attempt to express themselves, simply because people do not know what to say or how to say it.This happens particulalry around sexual issues, partly because people often find this awkward to discuss, particulalry when it impacts on anyone with any kind of disability or illness. Contemplating sexual desires in another is often not easy, particularly when the individual has limited life expectancy and health issues which affect what they are able to do.Breast cancer and prostate cancer by their very nature impact on sexuality, partly due to the direct nature of surgery and radiotherapy, partly due to the indirect effects of hormonal manipulation.
Using his Provocative Therapy, Frank discussed life expectancy,sexuality,body image,relationships with significant others,financial matters,all in an open and supportive fashion,covering everything in a mere 25-30 minutes-producing the client's final response-"now I feel I have hope." Frank used humour and a remarkable openess which simultaneously suported yet freed the conversation wherever it went and as an example of how to have an effective and productive interaction in such a situation it was absoloutely superb.
So often such an interaction can be merely a grim and ineffective 25minutes of passing the tissue box whilst the client sobs hopelessly, and the therapist feels terrible and powerless to assist.I was delighted to have been present because I personally learnt a lot, but also because for everyone else present, whether friend,relative,partner,parent,child or therapist,whenever we are faced with "difficult" interactions, we now have simple effective tools to use which are immensely powerful , and make such an interaction meaningful, with magnificent resonance for all involved.
Frank manages to make such interactions look deceptively simple-like a conversation between two old friends-speaking as a doctor with 25 years experience-provocative therapy is simply superb.
Superb stuff indeed.

Dr S Elton


PERSPECTIVE 2 FROM ANDY NLP PRACTITIONER

"I'd just like to express my dissapointment in what was a non sequitur of an evening last Friday.

A good friend of mine who coaches in the North West paid for me to come along in expectation that we may learn something about the craft of a master. What in fact took place was completely irrelevant. I simply want to ask "why did you not think of stepping in to at least coax Frank and Sue away from the two hour fusilade of cock stories". Why?"

Andy
NLP Practitioner


The interview with Sue was actually the first half of the evening. In the second half Frank talked about the difference between the theory of seeing clients and the reality of some of the tough clients that are often not helped by trditional approaches.

BTW We offered the evening at just 20 pounds to cover costs and give people the opportunity to ask Frank questions. The first observer did ask about the session and spoke to Sue afterwards.

2 comments:

Andrew T. Austin said...

I suspect some day we will look back in amusement on the decade of insanity that broke out following the NLP "community's" popularization of "therapy" as a leisure activity for the innately stupid.

I meet just too many people these days who, because they have read a book or two on NLP, think that they must be thoroughly entertained by every training experience, and that they should not have to either think or apply any form of effort. I am willing to bet money that "Andy" neither spoke to the client nor to Frank Farrelly (of many decades of experience) about what transpired, but instead took a superior position whereby he knew best. This is an attitude I encounter so often from NLPers - all attitude and zero experience.

Nick Kemp said...

Sadly I have to agree...

Its IMO got even worse in recent times with the appearance of some of the NLP newsgroups where people endlessley applaud each other and in many cases exhibit almost cult like behaviours!